Thirsty!

Oh, man, the last few days I have had this unquenchable thirst.  It seems like the more liquid I drink, the thirstier I am!  And then of course it has me running to the bathroom about every 30 minutes or so.  On my floor the ladies room is all the way across the building so I am sure putting the miles on just walking there and back 20 times a day.  I should get out my pedometer and see if I get in my 10,000 steps just on trips to the bathroom.

So, we're down to less than 48 hours until my ultrasound.  The anticipation is killing me this week.  I also have this presentation that I have to do tomorrow for the EWU research symposium.  It's kind of funny because on an anxiety scale of 1-10, getting up to do a presentation is pretty much an 11.  But this U/S is putting me at about a 15.  Thank goodness for yoga.  I got this Yoga For Your Pregnancy DVD on Netflix this last week and it is so wonderful.  There is an energizing practice, a relaxing practice, a breathing practice, a meditation practice, and a couple other random things.  They are all really pretty relaxing though and it is so, SO helpful.  I have zero focus at work these days, my mind is always racing, so it's nice to just relax and breathe.  I highly recommend it.

Insurance plan fun

So… I had my ultrasound scheduled for Thursday at 1:45pm at Dr. B's office.  Well they called me this morning to go over the charges with me.  They had discussed with my insurance company, and my dedictible applies, so my responsibility was going to be something like $307.  My deductible is $300 so at first I thought, ok, well whatever.  But then I was thinking about it and that suddenly seemed really high given that at Dr. H's office my ultrasound bills have normally been for like $136 or something like that.  So then I thought, hmmm, maybe I can ask Dr. H to order an ultrasound, and it would be cheaper, and maybe they could even get me in SOONER!  Well, I got my wish…sort of.  Unfortunately I still have to wait until Thursday!  But now it's at 9:30am instead of 1:45pm, which is better anyway because now Eric won't have to be late for work :)  And I won't have to stress about it all morning.  I just won't be able to sleep all night on Wednesday.  OMG I can't wait!  I’m counting down the hours now… 67ish?  And I'm glad I possibly have saved over $150!  That's like, what, 4 boxes of diapers almost? ;)

Crazy Dream

I have been having some pretty wild dreams lately. I can't remember any of them anymore except the one I had last night. I'll have to be better about recording them sooner so they aren't lost forever. Anyway, last night I was dreaming that I worked at Burger King! I was new so I didn't know what to do, and I kept asking people what I was supposed to be doing but they were all ignoring me and the manager was really mean. I was talking to this guy at one point and he said the store was losing so much money they were going to go out of business anyway.

Aside from that, no real exciting news to share. The girls have been hurting SO bad and they are noticeably bigger too. I started wearing a bra to bed and that seems to help with the soreness, I presume because they aren't flopping around so much. I'm going to have to go get one without underwire though, it's not very comfy as it is. I'm a little annoyed that the bear icon on my pregnancy ticker is hovering between 8 and 12 weeks, even though I am only 7 weeks. What's up with that? Yesterday I had a headache in the morning and today it is back. I'm not loving that.

T minus 100 years

Ugh! It is only 7 days until my ultrasound but it might as well be a lifetime. The days, busy as they are, are still crawling by at a glacial pace. I have been trying to think of an excuse to call the doctor and demand we do it already, but I'm coming up with nothing. I'm also endlessly analyzing all my symptoms and comparing this pregnancy to the previous 3. Clearly things are going better as far as I can tell. Ignorance would be bliss but unfortunately I know from my own experience and that of others' that I could still get a horrible disappointment on that little grainy screen, regardless of how "good" things seem. So I do my best to put that out of my mind.

I've started to develop a strange relationship with food. Yesterday I absolutely could not bring myself to eat either of the things in my lunch bag, so I had a roast beast wrap for lunch and for dinner a McDonald's crispy chicken (plain) before I went to class. And a fruit and yogurt parfait. My lunch choices were quiche, and half an enchilada with brown rice and black beans. I ate the enchilada today for lunch and it was delicious but I think quiche might be off the grid for good. Which is a little strange because that too was delicious when I made it this weekend. Also this morning I drank a glass of chocolate milk and shortly thereafter was the closest I have come to throwing up so far. Interesting. Finally iodized salt is going on pretty much everything because my book says most pregnant women don't get enough iodine, especially if they cook exclusively with kosher salt (like I do). Iodine deficiency contributes to thyroid problems.

So that's the latest. Keep praying for me, and for the week to fly by!

T minus 10 days

... until my ultrasound! Yay! Today I felt really sick off and on all day, the worst I've felt so far. I haven't really had a problem eating, it's in between meals.... even when I'm not hungry and not too full. Which could be dangerous, if I just start eating constantly! We looked around and finally found some "real" ginger ale at Huckleberry's so I'm getting ready to try that out.

I got a new pregnancy journal yesterday, it's called Happy Baby, Healthy Mom. I like it a lot better than my What to Expect... one, because it isn't "tainted" with any previous failed pregnancy documentation. And also because it is completely chronological instead of being split up into weird sections (like a whole 9 months of exercise logs all together, followed by 9 months of nutrition logs, etc). So I don't have to keep flipping around. I also bought a book called Husband Coached Childbirth, which I told Eric was my ultimate positive thinking purchase. I'm sure I won't be needing that one for awhile but I started reading it anyway. It is by Dr. Robert Bradley (i.e. the Bradley natural childbirth method) and let me just tell you, whoa, so overwhelming. More on that subject later. We also bought the Dude's Guide to Pregnancy, which I think Eric must be reading right now because it's really quiet and every once in awhile I hear him giggling.

Last but not least, no more spotting! Seriously, not a drop today. W00t!

Yay, 6 weeks!

So I had some more weirdness today, still spotting but then also some dark flecks of something more solid like, EW.  So that freaked me out enough to call up Dr. H and talk to the nurse.  Interestingly enough she was pregnant too and has the exact same date of her last period as me.  She said she's also been having the same symptoms and has a similar history so she's been a crazy lunatic around the office.  That made me feel better.  Anyway, she said sometimes the blood kind of clumps up and sticks together and as long as it's still brown it's probably fine.  She said if it would make me feel better she'd order up another HCG, stat, so I took her up on that.  I just got the results back (already!) and it's up to 14,533.  So if my HCG was exactly doubling every 48 hours then that is just about right.  She said right about this time the HCG starts to taper off so doing any more would probably worry me even more.  So that's it.  Now I REALLY have to wait unless I kick and scream and insist on having an ultrasound.  But the last thing I want is to have an U/S too early, not see a heartbeat, and then have to sweat about that for another week before they can do another one.  So I'm happy now.

Positive thoughts

Around 1pm I finally got tired of waiting and called Dr. B's office again to make sure they had gotten my message. I got the distinct impression they hadn't. Anyway, they transferred me to a PA, who took my message and then amazingly enough Dr. B himself returned my call just a few minutes later. I told him what was going on and he pretty much told me exactly what I did not want to hear. If it's gonna happen there's nothing we can do, it could be a false alarm, it's too early to do an ultrasound, just try to stay positive and not do anything too strenuous. For two weeks. ARGGGHHH! He said my blood work was great, my hormones were doing what they were supposed to, my progesterone was awesome (it was 36 and anything over 10 is good he said) and it could just be nothing. He said we *could* do another blood draw, but even if my levels are still going up I could still have a miscarriage regardless. Which isn't too surprising given what happened last time.

So I am going to just forget about this whole thing and take advantage of the rest of my day off. I have a hair and eyebrow appointment at 2:45pm and a coupon for 20% off my entire Bed Bath and Beyond purchase. That should take my mind off things. Then later when I get home I am going to do some yoga to bring on the positive energy. All the while ignoring the fact that my boobs no longer really hurt. But they do seem bigger. And my right one seems bigger than the left, and that was the one hurting. So maybe they're just done with this growth spurt and gearing up for the next one? LOL let's hope so, and hope they even out on the next go 'round ;)